Rewards?

Should a kid get fancy toys just because all of their friends have fancy toys?
Should good grades be rewarded?
What are the pros and cons to buying a kid anything that you wish you had when you were a kid?

I have a lot of opinions on these things. I don't think that a kid needs something just because all of their friends have it. If they want something cool, offer them a trade. Well, we could buy you this, but would you do this many hours of work around the house first? That way they get a sense of accomplishment. If the hours don't get accomplished, they don't get the toy.

Good grades should be rewarded. Grades don't have to be perfect, just good. It can be a reward for working hard, even if the grades aren't perfect. Otherwise, what incentives does a child have to do well in school. They have to give up their free time for what? For some intangible benefits that they don't understand? I think they need something that they can see. And the reward should not be given if the kid doesn't at least try.

Kids are not objects. They are not to be used to show off how much money a parent has. I hated when all I was, was an object my dad could brag about. See what my daughter has, see her perfect grades, see her a cheerleader. I was happy to be appreciated, but when I wasn't perfect, I just got in trouble. I wanted to be appreciated even when I wasn't perfect. If you want a fancy toy, buy it for yourself, you had to earn the money for it. Your kid doesn't need more toys than they know what to do with, just so mommy or daddy can brag about what nice things there are.

If you have an agreement with someone, adult or child that they do a certain thing and they get a certain reward... under NO circumstance should that reward be given if the thing was not done. Otherwise how will they learn that hard work has rewards? When I really wanted to buy a special doll when I was a child (still have the doll) my mom helped me earn the money. She gave me tasks to do with a certain amount of cash reward. It took me forever to save up the 100 dollars I needed. My mom kindly paid taxes and shipping. But I value that doll a LOT more because I know how much work I had to do to get it. I had to give up playing with my friends sometimes to help clean. I couldn't buy candy or other small things that I wanted. It required sacrifice.

I guess I sound like a lunatic... but somehow I don't like the kids who are sitting in the middle of a room filled with toys saying that they're bored. I also don't like perfectly good children/adults who don't know how to work hard to accomplish things because no one ever taught them to work. I guess that's the American in me showing through. I tend to blame a lot of the lack of success of some people on a 'flawed character' model. Or lack of a good work-ethic.